What is Self-Care

What does self-care really mean?

There is a new awareness of the importance of self-care, but what does that really mean and what does that look like? Is this another checklist we have to tick? Is it another thing we have to squeeze into our already busy, busy lives? Is this something that we have to earn? Is it a reward for being “good”?

Why is it that when it comes to taking care of us, (me, you) that we find it so difficult? Why can we give so freely to others but not ourselves? Why is it so easy to encourage others to be kind to themselves but we then deny ourselves the simple well-being that we all crave and need? Could it be that to care for someone means we deem them worthy of our care? That underneath the surface we feel we don’t deserve the time or the effort it takes to self-care?

What does self-worth have to do with self-care? a lot actually. It’s easy to think of self-care as doing things, going for a walk, eating well, and taking care of ourselves in practical ways and it is this, but it is much more. It’s the reason why we do it. Do we do it because we read about it and think it’s something we should do or do we do it because it’s a natural part of who we are? Good self-worth- knowing we have value gives us the ability and desire to care for ourselves in a more holistic way, not just on the outside but on the inside as well. Let’s look at some aspects of self-care that you may not have thought about before.

Emotional well-being - becoming in tune with ourselves helps us to regulate our emotions and to understand the difference between healthy and harmful emotional thinking. There is a sense of well-being that comes from exploring why we feel the way we feel. Learning to recognize what you are feeling and allowing yourself to experience that feeling, gives you an understanding of your emotions which allows you to learn to express them in a more healthy way, giving you more control of your responses and reactions to different situations. It is also a tool for self-improvement.

Mental health- Mental health is different from mental illness. Learning to care for your mental health involves getting an understanding of how your mind responds to life. Knowing when the stresses of life become overwhelming and how to care for yourself gives you the opportunity to avoid burnout, breakdown, and the inability to cope. Therapy helps to uncover the inner patterns that help form the way we think and the reasons behind our reactions. Learning healthy boundaries and how to set reachable goals all contribute to good mental health.

Spirituality - No matter what you believe, spirituality has a part to play in self-care. The belief in something outside of ourselves can give us a sense of hope and a belief system to live by. This personal practice of spiritual self-care helps us to create a value system in which we feel empowered to understand our purpose and meaning in life.

Self-care strategies

How do I self-care?

We all know that we should eat better, exercise more, sleep reasonable hours, etc, but how do we self-care emotionally, mentally, and spiritually?

Emotional Self-care

Take some time to understand how you feel and why in certain situations you react or respond the way you do. Learning to pause and reflect on situations, to give some space to really understand what you are feeling can give you a new perspective and insight. The practice of mindfulness, gratitude, and meditation can all improve emotional well-being. Talking through how you are feeling with trusted friends, a Therapist, or a family member who is supportive also can be beneficial. Knowing and understanding boundaries helps to assist you in keeping your emotions in balance.

Mental self-care

Remember mental self-care is different from mental illness, mental illness should always be checked and managed by your doctor, Mental self-care is taking care of your mind. Having a work/life balance is important to keep a clear and active mind, over-loading yourself with too much of anything can knock that balance out of kilter. Maintaining a good healthy lifestyle can bring about a sense of clarity and well-being which all contribute to a balanced state of mind. Keeping the mind stimulated also keeps the mind sharp and active, puzzles, crosswords, and other mental challenges help to improve the mind’s elasticity and agility.

Spiritual Self-care

Surrounding ourselves with people, practices, and reminders of our faith or spiritual beliefs can help us to ground ourselves and understand our purpose. They help to give us a compass to navigate the true meaning of our lives and why we exist. It’s essential to take some time to reflect, ponder and understand the things and reasons we believe the way we do. This spiritual reflection empowers us to move closer to being who we truly believe we are meant to be.

Self-care or the lack of it is a reflection of our beliefs about ourselves. To care for yourself is you deem yourself worthy 0f that care. To be worthy is to have value. We all have Value we just need to recognize it.